Days in the life - Weeks 9, 10, and 11... 12... 18!!

I had almost got this post ready to go more than six weeks ago. And then George Floyd was murdered, the country exploded, and my brain went into a Trudeau pause. 

Then I started working on it again. 

And then the situation in California started to deteriorate and I got blocked again. Lots has been happening, and now I feel like writing again, but I'll start by finishing this ancient post and putting it out into the ether.

First comes the orignal 'new' preface to the post  from when I came back to it in June, after three weeks or so from first writing it at the end of May... confused yet? Picture yourself sometime in early June... probably still in proper lockdown, curves flattening in the US and UK, the virus just beginning to really take hold in Brazil... but generally feeling hopeful... which you probably still are if you live in Canada or the UK. 

Mid-June preface: Reading back through the post as I wrote in in May feels like an earlier, innocent time. A time when it was just the pandemic. Now we have the pandemic plus protests. Hearing people talk at the protests and about the protests has been inspiring, deeply moving, and frustrating. I listened to and can recommend this great discussion led by President Obama "Reimaging policing in the wake of continued police violence"  and also this Sunday Read from the NYT 'The Condition of Black Life is One of Mourning' by Claudia Rankine. 

So far the scale and persistence of the mostly peaceful protests seem to be having an effect - many announcements have been made about reforming police forces across the country and rethinking the massive police budgets. The scale of police funding is mind boggling. And it strikes me that while there have been many news stories over the years about the US public health system is hopelessly underfunded, a situation shown in stark relief by the pandemic, and stories about even the mighty US military facing equipment shortages (e.g. bullet proof vests were in short supply during the 2003-11 Iraq war), we never hear about the police having too little riot gear, too few bullets, too few vehicles. Back in 2011, Mayor Bloomberg said, "I have my own army in the NYPD, which is the seventh largest army in the world." An article in 2018 said that if you compared the NYPD's budget of $5.5 Billion with other countries it would rank #36 for defense spending! I hope that the momentum continues to build, and that there is real systemic change.

Interestingly, the mood in the country right now reminds me of the months following 9/11 when fear suffused the nation. But what you fear depends on where you live. I have found it really odd that there doesn't seem to be a unified fear of this virus across the nation. But that is because it seems ludicrous to me that anyone would want to politicize a pandemic. How naive. In the Republican states, Trump and Fox News have easily been able to incite fear of the experts, of loss of freedoms, of the economic impact of lockdown, but not of getting sick, dying, or having people close to you get sick or die. Maybe some Americans are better at fearing other people rather than pathogens? Trump has always known to play on the basest fears of red-state Americans. How to get liberals excited? Play on their fears of climate change, increasing economic divides, failing health, education, and democratic systems. How depressing that success for Trump came by putting a face to fears with his intensely personal racist, sexist, xenophobic, bigoted politics. Back in 2016 during his campaign, Trump said in an interview, “Real power is — I don’t even want to use the word — fear.” I came across a jokey definition of fear: False Evidence Appearing Real. Maybe Trump saw that too. 

Ok. Here's the now-ancient post. 

From end of May: Funny to look back at my last post where I was wafting around Mother Theresa-like, imagining I was keeping things alive. Had a rude awakening one afternoon when I saved a spider from the pool, put it on the side and it ran off but then a lizard immediately ran out and ate the spider! And then not too much later, Pepper, who spends most of his days with his head stuck in the hedge trying to catch stuff, turned up in the house proudly bearing a catatonic lizard. We managed to catch the lizard and take it outside, where it ran off apparently unharmed.  But later Pepper came back with either the same lizard or another, well and truly dead. 

 

In addition to my misguided role in trying to disrupt the carnage of the food chain, this past week has actually been quite challenging. We had a heatwave with temperatures soaring to around 100°F (37°C) for several days. Our house doesn't have air conditioning, which is fine most of the time since the design of the house keeps it around ten degrees cooler than outside. But once it gets into the high 90s outside - and the high 80s inside - we all turn into monsters! I found this reminder written on the fridge by ThingTwo after the first rather combative 100°F day. Actually, it now reads 'Happy - Nice - Kind - Frozen Peas' - someone used the space to add to the grocery list! 

 

And now we have the added drama of keeping Ziggy the Frog's tank within the prescribed range of 75-85°F. As the ambient temperature climbed, ThingOne and I packed Ziggy's tank with ice packs. It worked but by the afternoon we were having to change the packs every 45 minutes! Not exactly a sustainable solution! Particularly if we ever want to travel (assuming that is possible in some future world!) I was reminded of one time we were away on travels and our dear neighbours in Canada heroically blew bubbles into our fish tank to keep it aerated during a power outage! 

We did some research online and went to Mr Husband to propose getting a small portable air conditioning unit. Unfortunately we caught Mr H at a bad moment. The room where he has set up his home office catches the afternoon sun and the room was probably well over 90°F. How could we come to him with a proposal for an air conditioner for a frog while he was having to work in these sweltering conditions? Things got a little tense. I decided to remove myself from the situation and left him and ThingOne to duke it out. They came out a bit later with a great compromise - we would get an air conditioning unit for the office and Ziggy would move in with Mr H during heatwaves. [Present me update: we now have a second portable air conditioning unit for the office!]

The last week of May was ThingTwo's last week of formal instruction for Grade 5. There is one more week of school, but it will be just fun stuff including an online graduation ceremony. We had a surprise visit last weekend from her teacher and the school principal. The teachers drove to all the 5th grader's homes dropping off a special yard sign, class t-shirt, and graduation certificate. Even though we had to all keep our distance and wear masks it was just so lovely to see them in person! 

Friday, the last day of instruction, happened to encapsulate the extremes of the whole online schooling experience. In the morning, she had a fantastic online group activity; in the afternoon she battled first with buggy math program software and then, as she became increasingly frustrated, with me when she just wanted to quit everything and zonk out in front of the TV. 

But the morning was just great. A few days ago I got an email from her teacher with just the best subject line ever: "Info for 5th Grade squid pickup." Not a typo. We had to pick up a dead squid or ThingTwo's science class. On Thursday we went up to the school to pick a double-bagged squid. The next morning,  the  science teacher led the class through an online squid dissection! First, ThingTwo examined the head and tentacles - learning to distinguish between the feeding tentacles and the feet. I'd never put it together that the name of the class 'cephalopod' - squid, octopus, nautilus - means 'head footed' in Greek. ThingTwo then found the beak and then pulled it out along with the oesophagus. Next up she cut open the body and learned how to sex a squid - we had a male - and found the gills, three hearts, liver, and ink sack. Then the science lesson turned into a cooking lesson as she gutted the squid, extracted the quill, and removed the outer skin - next step would have been slicing up for calamari but for some reason we weren't allowed to eat the squid. 

ThingTwo had been looking forward to 'getting to cut something up' for a long time. She does have this rather ghoulishly curious side to her - a fascination for dead things and inspecting people's cuts and bruises. She isn't at all squeamish but has one Achilles heel - if ThingOne injures himself she goes to pieces. ThingTwo surprised herself during her first official dissection by starting out nervous, "My hands are shaking!" she said as she made the first cuts. But then she became relaxed and determined - even managing the delicate process of eyeball extraction!

I've become one of those people who seems to have a lot pictures of food on my phone! We continue to make and bake. ThingOne mostly leads the charge and much of the food we eat is now green or frog-shaped in honor of Ziggy.

Frog-shaped soda bread and Green Matcha choc chip cookies

 

He also made butter and buttermilk out of some cream that had gone off  slightly! And cinnamon buns! 

The other day ThingOne said he thought he might enjoy 'doing something to do with food' as a career. To date the most specific things he has said about the future is that he might like to work in a skate shop and maybe think about community college. I managed to quell my excitement and nonchalantly said, 'Oh yeah. Cool.' Meanwhile I'm immediately picturing him becoming known as the skateboarding chef and opening a ground-breaking frog-themed restaurant. If you've never heard Pete and Dud do the Frog and Peach sketch maybe now is the time... 

On the COVID front, things are changing slowly here in Santa Clara county at the official level. We have this awesome very cautious county health officer - Dr Sara Cody - who is making changes to the original order very slowly. After each small change, like allowing construction to resume or outdoor recreation, she waits two weeks to make sure there isn't a surge in cases. Very sensible. But other counties that have fewer cases overall are moving at a much faster pace through the Governor's phases for reopening. Governor Newsom says, "Localism is determinative. We put out the how, counties decide the when." It sounds good, but I think this approach is causing confusion and people to think along the lines of 'Well, if they are doing that In LA/San Diego/Santa Barbara, then I can do it too'. 

In the middle of May I went up to the hospital in Sunnyvale for my regular treatment. I go every month and it has been interesting to see the changes in protocol since the shelter-in-place started in March. On previous visits I've been stopped at the entrance but only had to answer questions (e.g. back in March it was whether I'd travelled to China, Italy, Korea, or Iran. Seems so quaint now.) But this time a nurse took my temperature with one of those Star Trek-like wands they point at your forehead, and when I passed I got a yellow sticker on my shirt. Now everyone has to wear a mask inside the building, but the staff inside the treatment center were wearing less PPE than before - just face masks as opposed to those full face visors and masks and gowns they wore in March. Inside the treatment center the atmosphere was very different to the past few months. While the staff still felt quiet and a little tense, I was really surprised to see lots of visitors with patients, most of them elderly, and there was a general hubbub of chatter and laughter. 

So strange really. Nothing about the virus has changed - it is still as contagious, still as deadly, there is still no treatment, no vaccine, we still don't have adequate tracking and testing in California, and the number of daily cases is similar. Why is everyone getting so relaxed about it all? If this were a Star Wars movie, this would be the part where someone would say 'I have a bad feeling about this...'  [Future me is reading this and shaking my head and sighing. When I wrote this California was between 2000-3000 new cases per day. Now California is averaging 9,000-10,000 new cases per day.]

I just read an interesting article in Knowable Magazine about the psychology of decision making during a pandemic. Apparently we humans have a bias towards action. We like to feel we are doing something. So initially the lockdown orders were great - 'doing nothing' and staying home was in fact taking action. But now, 11 weeks in the urge to 'do something' continues - hence, the psychologists argue - the rush towards reopening.

The month ended with us all taking a break from reality and watching first the scratched launch and then the actual  launch of of the NASA SpaceX rocket taking astronauts 'Bob and Doug' to the International Space Station. By the way, who would ever think that astronauts would have names like Bob and Doug? Sounds so undignified and not at all futuristic. They really should have names like Flash and Vultan! Anyway, it was a good distraction for a pandemic Saturday. What a weird and wonderful moment amongst so much crazy.

Interview [Future me didn't realize this would be the last interview for six weeks!]

ThingTwo: Today is... what day is it? It is Sunday May 24, 2020 and we are outside eating dinner. We are going to do questions. It was extremely hot today. All of us went in the pool, which was fun. It is the end of week nine of this thing. Now you can listen to me hum. Hummmm. 

I'll do me first.

Is yeast alive? Does yeast have feelings?

I don't know. 

What was the last 'normal' picture that you were in or that you took?

Me: Let's see... that would be March 12 - a picture at a riding lesson, look, you handing the reins off to someone at Garrod farm. No social distancing. [Present me note: Riding lessons with masks and gloves started up again June 18.]

T2: What does normal mean? Pre-pandemic? It was me on my bed saying hi to people.

Me: What? That isn't pre-pandemic? That is what you did when it all started!

T2: No, no, no that was before, I just said hi because I was bored. 

Can you remember any weird dreams you had? Are your dreams weirder than usual?

One of my weird dreams was that I was a centaur and I was magical and this evil being came and destroyed us and there was Darth Vader and then we all became jedis. I think my dreams are pretty weird all the time. 

Ok. If you could change your first name what would you choose?

Chrysanthemum. [All laugh - this is T2's absolute favorite name for anything at the moment.]

Why do people fight? 

I don't have any idea.

What does cat taste like? 

I imagine it tastes horrible. For me that would taste horrible because I love cats and would hate eating them.

How would you describe yourself?

I don't really know. I would ask someone that I trust what they think of me. 

Me: Do you trust me?

T2: Well, yes, but because you are my mum but you can't put anything sad about me because you are my mum!

Who is someone you can admire and why?

I don't actually have anyone. [We make various suggestions and she says no, no, I like them but I don't admire them.]

Me: Ok, thanks ThingTwo, I will now do you ThingOne. Is yeast alive? Does yeast have feelings?

T1: Um, we cannot know for sure but they don't have brains so I'm guessing not, kind of like worms. 

Me: What was the last normal photo you took?

Mr H: What is the criteria for normal?

T1: Before quarantine. 

Me: Something you can't do post lockdown. 

T1: Ok - here is a picture I took of [XXX] and I'm definitely within six feet. 

Me: Can you remember any dreams you have had lately and are your dreams weirder than normal?

T1: I'm definitely remembering my dreams a lot more but I don't know if they are weirder. 

[T1 then gets distracted by frog memes for a while]

Ok there was a recent one where it was like a dream inside a dream but they weren't that weird. It was like I had a weird dream but I was in control of it and I woke up and I was in a dream. But it was in the morning when I was in that phase of waking up and I would wake up and not know if I was still asleep or not. And one time I woke up and got up and everything, but I hadn't at all, it was all a dream.

Me: If you could change your first name what would you choose?

T1: I don't know. My name is cool. Thank you. 

Me: Why do people fight? 

T1: I don't know, some people are just less smart than others. So they decide to rise against. Like the French. [He then laughs a lot and then blushes - all very mysterious to us.]

Me: What does cat taste like (who came up with these questions?!)

T1: Probably like chicken but furry. 

Me: How would you describe yourself?

T1: I'm more than average height for my age and... exist.

Me: Have zits?

T1: No... exist! Jeez mom.

[In the background T2 says she has changed her answer to someone she admires, "I actually admire myself."]

Me: Who is someone you admire?

T1: Tony Hawk. Because he has done a lot for skating and also CJ Collins because he is cool and young.

Me: Cool. Thank you for your answers. 

T1: Ok I will interview you. Hey mum. 

Is yeast alive?

Me: Yes. It is a single cell fungi that uses oxygen and sugar to make carbon dioxide. Those are the bubbles. It burps. 

T1: Yes but does it have feelings?

Mr H: It is exhalation not burping. Does burping come out of your lungs? No!

Me: Does yeast have lungs? 

[There then follows an intense discussion about the difference between burping and exhaling. We agree to disagree.]

T1: Have you had any dreams weirder than usual?

Me: Definitely. [A squabble then breaks out and no one listens to my fascinating theory about the pandemic and dreams.]

T1: T2, get your feet off the table!

Mr H: T1 stop being the T2 police! 

T1: Ok. Look, I was literally...

Mr  H: It doesn't matter, really.

Me: [Pushing on, ignoring squabble.] I'm going to look for my last normal photo.

Everyone: (many exclamations) Oh no! (T2 fell in the pool) (T1 laughs unkindly, T2 leaves upset)

Mr H to T1: Laughing at the absurdity is one thing, laughing at her feels different, you know?

T1: Yeah. (sounding sad but possibly faking it)

Mr H (who thinks he is faking it): Come on. It doesn't cost you anything. 

[Break while T2 is checked up on - she's wet but ok]

Me: [Still largely ignoring goings on, obviously still scrolling through my phone] Wow, I have taken a lot of pictures of food since lockdown. Oh, it looks like my last normal picture was that one of T2 at her riding lesson.

T1: Have you had any weirder dreams than usual?

Me: Yes, the reason I put that question was because I'd had this weird dream that I worked for facebook, I hate facebook, and they had stores like the Mac stores and the uniform was a pink hat with ears like Louise in Bob's Burgers. 

T1: If you could change your first name what would it be?

Me: Biscuit. 

Mr H: Mum has always wanted to actually be a pony. 

T1: Why do people fight?

Me: Because they get angry. 

T1: Yeah, that was what I was going to say. 

T1: What does cat taste like?

Me: Why did you choose that question?

T1: I don't know, you were like T1, write a question, and I was like errrrr...

Me: Were you in a bad mood?

T1: No, I mean, yeah I think so, I was arguing with T2 because she stole my original question. Anyway, 

more questions. How would you describe yourself?

Me: Round with a crumbly top. 

T1: Like a muffin!

Me: Like a biscuit. 

[T2 has reappeared on the scene and T1 must be doing something objectionable again.]

Mr H: T1! You need to MYOB. Seriously. 

T1: Who is someone you admire and why? And what does MYOB mean?

Mr H: Mind your own business. 

T1: mmm-yob. 

Mr H: Just for reference there is also BYOB. Bring your own bottle.

T1: beee-yob.

Me:  And now in pandemic times there is BYOE - bring your own everything.

Ummm. Who do I admire? Kind of everyone.

Mr H: Stalin, Hitler...

Me: Well I suppose they got stuff done.

Mr H: Uh huh. That's your take on Stalin? "He got stuff done"?

Me: Ok. Ok. [Long pause, lovely birds singing in the background] Probably Obama.

T1: Why? 

Me: Because he managed to lead while being dignified and courteous and respectful and caring and funny. 

T1: Good answer. yeah, I have that picture of Obama drinking Guinness. It is funny. [Picture is then found - it is good - see it here.]

T1: Ok Dad, is yeast alive?

Mr H: Yes. 

T1: Does yeast have feelings?

Mr H: No. I don't think this question led to the conversation you were hoping for! I think it is definitely alive but it doesn't have any neurons. 

T1: Bread screams when you eat it! Waaa waaaa!

T1: What was the last normal photo that you took?

Mr H: I looked it up. It is either Mum trying on a sweater in a store. Previous to that it is mid-century modern furniture in the furniture store. Previous to that it is a snap of T2, which is super nice. Or the one that actually made me think 'that was kind of fun, a different life', was in a restaurant with Brian. We had hotpot and it was delicious. My last outing when we had freedom. 

T1: Have you had any weird dreams? 

Mr H: Yes, I have a recurring weird dream that is troubling me. I am playing a guitar but the neck of the guitar is all floppy, keeps drooping, which makes it very difficult to play. I'm sure that means something terrible. So that is a weird dream

Me: Is that weirder than usual?

Mr H: No, I don't think my dreams are any weirder than usual. It is just that is a recurring dream. 

T1: Are you remembering dreams more than usual?

Mr H: No, not really. 

T1: If you could change your first name what would you change it to and why?

Mr H: Pretty much anything other than [name]. I've never liked my name. 

[All express surprise]

T1: Mum thinks it is very handsome. 

Mr H: No, when I meet someone else called [name] I think, 'what a terrible name' and then I realize that applies to me.

T1: Oh no! That's so sad. When I meet someone with my name I'm always like 'woooo'.

Mr H: Yeah, your name is a good name. It is sort of modern and classic at the same time. 

[Yikes, then I make the worst joke/pun about T1's name and find it SO funny (the only person who did). I can only conclude I must have had a glass of wine!]

T1: Why do people fight?

Mr H: Don't know. Because they don't agree. 

Me: Look there's an avocado!

Mr H: No it isn't. 

Me: Ha ha. 

T1: What does cat taste like?

Mr H: I don't know but I've heard it is delicious. I saw a youtube video where someone had a skewer of meat somewhere in an outdoor market and the guy asks the vendor what kind of meat it is and the vendor just says 'miow miow miow' and then the video freezes on the guy's horrified face. 

T1: How would you describe yourself?

Mr H: I once had a reference letter that ended by describing me as being unfeasibly tall. It was a weird thing to put in a reference letter but it was a genius move because it was remembered exactly by the people who read the letter, it stood out. [XXXX] wrote me that letter and I'll never forget those words and I thanked him for it fifteen years later. 

T1: Who do you admire and why?

Mr H: I don't know. Tough one. So many people. I admire musicians. If you can do that, especially if you can compose things, I think that is kind of miraculous and amazing. 

T1: Nice. That was great. Recording off!